?serene's life?

Sunday, October 27, 2013

And its yet another long break from work for me again!!
All the way until Thurs! =p
Looking forward to tmr!
Another short getaway to KL (yes, again -.-)
But this time its gonna be with Qila and Dusty!!
Yay!! :D
Qila and me managed to psycho Nasir into letting us clear our AL tgt!!
Hehe ^^
Have yet to pack my stuff but whatever la
Shall do that tmr morning instead
Besides what do I really need for just a short 3D2N trip like this? HA!

Had seafood dinner just now with Qila, Carol, Jeremy and Gerard at newton to celebrate Carol's promotion to GRE! happy for her! :D
Been so long since the few of us gathered tgt ald.
Miss those times!

Oh yes! There wonderful peeps at work gave me a belated surprise after work the other day for my birthday!
Hahaha!! :D
Was totally not expecting that =p
That's why I love them so so much!
Hahaha! :D
And guess what they got for me? =p
An Ukulele!!
In purple!! AHHHH!! XD
With all their wishes and signatures at the back of it!
Love it so much!! ^^

Went out with Dan, Cat, TKL, Justin all the other day to eat also!
And we went to the USS Halloween again this year!!
Had so much fun and screaming all the way and trying to cut the very super duper long queues!
Opps!! =x
Hahah!! :D

Basically had a good birthday this year and not too bad a week :)
Thanks to all the people out there who made it enjoyable and those that wished me! :)
But there's still something missing.. Something..
Waiting and hoping still no doubt. =x

Can't wait for tmr!! Really!!
Shall empty my mind of all stuff and enjoy myself :)
就暂时把脑袋放空吧
把一切都暂时忘了, 什么都不要去想

writtern @11:55 PM

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

**this is seriously such a rojak post..

everything oso have! haha! :D**

and its a long off again!!

5 days!

gonna do nth and rot at home again.. =x

feel so lepak this month..

ald mid of the month ald but only worked like 1 week..

hahah! :D

juz had 4 days straight off the previous week and now 5 days..

went on a one day trip to JB with Qila, Arthur, Jeremy and his cousin the previous week

then another 4 days straight the week after..

hahah! :D

cant wait for the week after to come..

then its the trip to KL with Qila and Dusty! =p

think its gonna be fun! especially its the three of us tgt!

haha! :D

hmmm..

how fast time flies

another hour or so before i hit 20

the pre age of adulthood i would call it before i officially hit 21

time to starting growing up and to learn how to be more independent than i am now

but oh well..

whatever la..

its still gonna be yet another normal day as usual

no plans at all

just gonna rot at home like usual

watch my drama, read my manga and sleep whole day

yup..

thats how boring it is..

can't be bothered

to speak frankly, nth for me to look forward to

maybe just one wish

one that i don't think will happen..

and that is.. to see him..

him with his army 'hair', in his uniform, and just him himself...

had this very random convo with Carol and Dusty the other days about how good-looking most guys look in police and SCDF uniform

coz there was one group of SCDF personnels staying at the hotel the other day

somehow curious to know how he will look like in his army uniform..

i know he will be very charming

like how he always is and will be.. :)

but dont think i will get the chance ba =x

suffocating each and every day while working.. each and every second of it..

all thanks to the groupon deal that is going on and the long weekend and the public holiday

but definitely not because of the workload

but thanks to all the locals that are checking in

this specific group of guests that kept coming

army boys..

yup.. that's right.. army boys..

tgt with their gf..

fuck this shit man...

how much i miss him but yet...

and they all just have to come and remind me of how much i miss him but yet i couldn't see him..

this is serious shit

for the first time i think i really know what does it feels to suffocate mentally

and best part?

i have to pretend that nth happen and smile and do my job

fuck this shitr

and its like for like 4 continuous days

so mentally and emotionally drained..

not to mention that i kena by the night shift manager the other day coz i mistakenly made a sale on the guest's credit card instead of doing a authorization like i should have :(

haix!

how long has it been since i made a mistake at work..

so irritated with myself..

not the mentioned that i was dying and lacking in slp coz i had to work two shifts the previous day coz the new girl took MC..

scare the shit out of the two night shift people and Dusty when i came out from the morning briefing

haha.. come to think of it their expression and reaction quite epic oso la.. =x

but cant be helped oso la..

according to them i was looking so cui and my face was so black..

opps! hahah!! :D

1 year and 4 days since we got to know each other..

how much i miss those times and days..

if only i can turn back time....... :)

*"halo :)"*

oh!! how much i missed blogging!

lol!

but have been so tired and lazy to do it..

hmm.. shall forgive myself for this lengthy post then!

lols!!

and its just gonna be yet another normal day tmr..

ha.

writtern @11:05 PM

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Being demanding is so not me.
So yup..
Tried to be understanding in my own way although there's a chance that he may think otherwise...
Just two more days.
Don't want him to have to rush and run all over the place and tire himself.
Shall give him the time he needs to settle whatever he needs to ba.
But that means not being able to see him. Haix!! :(
Why so fan one la?!
Want to see him so bad.
Feel like being dead unreasonable for once to make him meet me.

So that I can see him.

For my own selfish reason.

But can't bring myself to do it.
Especially when he has so much things on hand.

Fuck la!!
Fuck this feeling of dilemma la!!
Can I kill myself instead?

writtern @9:31 PM

Thursday, August 1, 2013

我想你..

却说不出口..

我想念你的声音, 你的笑声..

却听不到..

我想念你的味道..

却闻不到..

我想念你紧紧抱着我的时候..

却感觉不到..

我想念你的微笑..

却看不到..

我想念你的全部..

但最重要的是..

我想念你.. 非常的想念..

可你却不在生旁..

writtern @3:48 AM

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Long awaited off day.

Slept at 3am last night and woke up at 2pm.

Talk about what a sleepy head I am.

Lol.

Ate my breakfast cum lunch cum dinner at 4..

Mum cooked too much sides to go along with the rice.

What a rare thing.

But meant that I have more food to choose and eat. Hahah!

Went back to nap after meal all the way until 7 plus.

Cleared off the remaining of the food from afternoon's meal. As usual. Always the one that has to finish off all the food that nobody can finish. -.-

Caught up on two episodes of my tv drama and here I am again on my bed.

And that pretty sums up my off day.

What a boring one I know.

But oh well... Hahaha!

But I still can't get enough of my slp. :(

Must be the bad habitual sleeping habit of mine again.

Time to hit the sack again.

Morning tmr after so long.

But afternoon shift back again on tue.

Seriously. Third consecutive week of afternoon shift.

Oh. And I have to head back to Sch again tmr to collect my stuff.

What a chore. =x

Time to slp again.

What a sleep-filled day! Lols! -.-

writtern @11:52 PM

Saturday, July 27, 2013

The Internet at home is seriously pissing me off.

Keep disconnecting. -.-

Wanted to blog about so much things and rant.

Don't know where to start now oso. =x

Shall use the time while on the bus to rant instead sua.

Can't believe how incredibly tired I am these days.

Can't even wakeup in the morning and let alone work for the few extra bucks at housekeeping. :(

The habitual sleeping regardless of whether I'm actually really tired or not at any time of the day is back again.

Which explains why I'm so tired and slpy all the time now.

Bad sign bad sign.. Just means that I'm ...

And I can't control it.

Lets just hope it will go off or get better.

But seriously working between two departments at the same time is no easy thing as well.

Super tired for the past week where I have been trying to earn the extra bucks at housekeeping.

Think I'm torturing my body way too much these days.

Hmm... =x

And today marks the 9th month of us.

Don't know if he remembers..

But at the situation we are in now I guess any wishing are not in order..

Dreamt last night.

Such a rare thing.

Woke up with tears in my eyes and the feeling of wanting to cry.

But that's when I realized that I dreamt of him.

Grateful that I can still remember the dream.

Was kind of angry when the alarm woke me up from it. Lol.

But I can't help it can I..

Not when everything seems so right in that dream.

Not good.

Never good.

At these.

Learning. Trying. And getting demoralized with each minute.

I miss him.

I miss us.

writtern @12:16 AM

Saturday, July 13, 2013

The only time like this that I allow myself to think of this topic and things.

Death.

The thought of my loved ones leaving me.

How fragile life can be.

One can be alive and joking with you and the next they are gone.

Just like this.
The person that you may have love and care about so much.
The person that may have meant the whole world to you.
And in the blink of an eye they are gone.

No longer around. Anymore. Forever.

You can no longer see them, touch them, talk to them, joke with them, play with them.

No more. Nothing.

All you can do is just to miss them.
In all the ways that you can find.

Silently missing them in your heart, crying out loud when you miss them, cry yourself to sleep while missing them, staring at the photograph taken long time back remembering and reminiscing that moment back then.
That's about as much as it goes.

There's no way for you to make up for any of the mistakes you did to them.

No way to undo any regrets and guilt you have towards them.

Nothing can be done.

They can only live in your heart.

Until your heart stops beating. Or maybe not.

I may not be close to the family but to ask me not to feel sad about it is impossible.

Afterall he's still part of my family.

Attending his funeral last night has got me thinking so much.
Should really learn how to treat people right and treasure them while I can.
Always have been a lazy person that don't take the initiative to reach out to people.
Even those that mean so much to me. My own family. That special someone. My friends and buddies.
Should really start learning how to treat people right.
Should no longer stay in my comfort zone and instead move out.

I'm sorry I can't be there to send you on the last of your journey today. Please go in peace and leave no worries behind 1st uncle.

You will be missed.

writtern @2:01 AM